Now with Shahrukh Khan hosting KBC, I am also excited to try hosting it. I am sure some day I will also get a chance. "After Shahrukh, who?"...this question is giving sleepless nights to many...I have the answer..."Me, of course!!!"
Let's analyze what have been the USPs of Big B and King Khan in the show. Big B displayed a lot of energy, style, charisma, manliness, confidence, intelligence, wit, humour, friendliness, yet distance to an appropriate degree from the participants. Shahrukh, on the other hand, is concentrating on humour, sarcasm, style, friendliness, energy, youthfulness, dimples, and lady contestants...coz he feels he is stronger than Big B in all these departments. Shahrukh is failing in the first six of his target areas coz for those, he needs fundoo acting skills and he's goofin up. While for Big B, his areas mentioned above are not in fact his target areas, but are rather his actual qualities and he is one of the best in all of them. And he's a great actor as well. So he can fake a lot of qualities whenever he wants to, unlike Shahrukh.
Now without bothering too much about comparing the two hosts KBC has seen so far, let's now think about where I stand as far as becoming a KBC host is concerned. Let's look at the most important of the qualities which both Big B and Shahrukh seem to display...
1.Energy: This is my biggest problem-area. I never look energetic. Most people take that as disinterest, and they are not often wrong. I don't feel continuously and consistently interested in anything. I guess it is like that for everyone, but for me, the initial period when I am interested is pretty small. So I have to do something such that viewers don't feel I am dragging myself through the show. I have thought for a long time about this. It is against my basic instincts. I don't think I can manage being so energeting and enthusiastic for long. Just look at those chairs they sit on. I cannot climb and sit so high up and then get down again and again to go and massage Guggi or whoever, or shake hands, or hug, etc. etc.
2.Humour: My worst experience at having to be humourous was in a BSchool interview I attended last year. Misled by a friend of mine, I had written in the application that I had a good sense of humour and I immensely loved Physics. I hadn't imagined the implications of this until I entered the interview hall. Soon after "Hello Sir Hello Mam", I was given a high-school Physics textbook (Resnik & Halliday), asked to open any page at random and explain whatever was in there. I collided with 2-dimensional collisions. I explained all that to the best of my ability. Those block-heads surely didn't understand anything. Next, they asked me to crack a joke, coz I'd claimed that I had a stupendous sense of humour. Now the problem is, I don't remember jokes, and am very bad at narrating them even if some manage to come to my mind after thinking for a long time. For example, the only joke that I normally remember is the following (I heard it from my best friend during my KG classes, and have never forgotten it):
- There was a thief whose name was Chaddi. One day he stole something from somebody and was being chased by a mob. Everyone was shouting "Chaddi ko pakdo, Chaddi ko pakdo". Hearing this, sabne apni chaddi pakad lee. Then Chaddi ran and climbed a tree. So everyone started shouting "Chaddi ko utaaro, Chaddi ko utaaro". Ye sunke sabne apni chaddi utaar dee. (EOJ)
I'm sorry about the quality of the joke, but, I don't know why, I can't remember any other joke, and I can't forget this Chaddi-joke ever.
I didn't want to tell this Chaddi-joke in the interview and I couldn't think of any other joke. The interviewer clearly felt that either I didn't really have any good sense of humour, or I was too scared to crack a joke in front of him. Well, I could tell him theories on why a person with a good sense of humour does not have to be good at cracking jokes, but then, who listens :-(((
So it seems like something in my brain doesn't like storing jokes, though I do enjoy listening to them sometimes...i.e., for some time until I lose interest. And I am very bad at narrating them...I have tried a lot of times, it doesn't work out...even the Chaddi-joke, whenever I have told that to someone, he/she has given me a was-that-a-joke kind of look. Looks like I can't help myself even in this department.
Well, I am losing interest in this topic :-( Will try to concentrate for some more time...
3.Style: Big B has his charming tip-top style. His voice evokes respect and arouses curiosity in the listeners. He is like the best prof in the college...who doesn't take attendance, yet every student wants to attend his lectures coz he teaches brilliantly. His body-language is superb and his personality is exquisite. Shahrukh on the other hand has a unique haqlu style. His voice is thin and he occasionally tries to make it sound thick by speaking loud and at a high pitch. He has a nice smile; those dimples are enough to woo ladies, and he uses them efficiently. He looks more down-to-earth and friendly, possibly because of his rise from middle-class to stardom. It's my guess that it's easier to talk to Shahrukh than to Big B.
Ok, now let's see what I've got. I'm also very down-to-earth, coz I have been in the middle-class all through. I think I look good in suit. I have worn it a couple of times...on important occasions. I always forget to keep a hanky though. I walk like a robot. That's how I look, though I try my best to walk like Sanjay Dutt. I have a nice voice...more lady-killing than that of either of the gentlemen. But without being energetic, I am not sure how much of an impact I can make with that voice. My body language is very bad. I don't move a lot. And I speak without expressions. When I smile, I look sad. I struggle a lot with expressions. For example, when I have to show elation and joy when my friend comes and tells me very very happily that he has done "that" first time, the expression that really comes out is of "Saala u did it, so what? when will I do?" And God-Promise I don't mean anything like that. I don't know how to go about fixing this problem. My face has got some serious aberrations. I try to show some expression, something else shows up and I'm screwed.
4.Youthfulness: I used to think I was very youthful until a few days back when a friend of mine said I am kiddish + kidlike = kid. I guess I might feel young at old-age. I understand youth to mean jawaani, that's when all "that" happens. By Youth most people mean the post teenage adults in the twenties. But at 41 if Shahrukh Khan is representing the Youth and is bringing Youthfulness into KBC, then I guess I still have a lot of time to come out of my kiddishness and kidlikeness, i.e., kidness.
Bahut ho gaya. This topic sucks. I am not hosting KBC.
Let's analyze what have been the USPs of Big B and King Khan in the show. Big B displayed a lot of energy, style, charisma, manliness, confidence, intelligence, wit, humour, friendliness, yet distance to an appropriate degree from the participants. Shahrukh, on the other hand, is concentrating on humour, sarcasm, style, friendliness, energy, youthfulness, dimples, and lady contestants...coz he feels he is stronger than Big B in all these departments. Shahrukh is failing in the first six of his target areas coz for those, he needs fundoo acting skills and he's goofin up. While for Big B, his areas mentioned above are not in fact his target areas, but are rather his actual qualities and he is one of the best in all of them. And he's a great actor as well. So he can fake a lot of qualities whenever he wants to, unlike Shahrukh.
Now without bothering too much about comparing the two hosts KBC has seen so far, let's now think about where I stand as far as becoming a KBC host is concerned. Let's look at the most important of the qualities which both Big B and Shahrukh seem to display...
1.Energy: This is my biggest problem-area. I never look energetic. Most people take that as disinterest, and they are not often wrong. I don't feel continuously and consistently interested in anything. I guess it is like that for everyone, but for me, the initial period when I am interested is pretty small. So I have to do something such that viewers don't feel I am dragging myself through the show. I have thought for a long time about this. It is against my basic instincts. I don't think I can manage being so energeting and enthusiastic for long. Just look at those chairs they sit on. I cannot climb and sit so high up and then get down again and again to go and massage Guggi or whoever, or shake hands, or hug, etc. etc.
2.Humour: My worst experience at having to be humourous was in a BSchool interview I attended last year. Misled by a friend of mine, I had written in the application that I had a good sense of humour and I immensely loved Physics. I hadn't imagined the implications of this until I entered the interview hall. Soon after "Hello Sir Hello Mam", I was given a high-school Physics textbook (Resnik & Halliday), asked to open any page at random and explain whatever was in there. I collided with 2-dimensional collisions. I explained all that to the best of my ability. Those block-heads surely didn't understand anything. Next, they asked me to crack a joke, coz I'd claimed that I had a stupendous sense of humour. Now the problem is, I don't remember jokes, and am very bad at narrating them even if some manage to come to my mind after thinking for a long time. For example, the only joke that I normally remember is the following (I heard it from my best friend during my KG classes, and have never forgotten it):
- There was a thief whose name was Chaddi. One day he stole something from somebody and was being chased by a mob. Everyone was shouting "Chaddi ko pakdo, Chaddi ko pakdo". Hearing this, sabne apni chaddi pakad lee. Then Chaddi ran and climbed a tree. So everyone started shouting "Chaddi ko utaaro, Chaddi ko utaaro". Ye sunke sabne apni chaddi utaar dee. (EOJ)
I'm sorry about the quality of the joke, but, I don't know why, I can't remember any other joke, and I can't forget this Chaddi-joke ever.
I didn't want to tell this Chaddi-joke in the interview and I couldn't think of any other joke. The interviewer clearly felt that either I didn't really have any good sense of humour, or I was too scared to crack a joke in front of him. Well, I could tell him theories on why a person with a good sense of humour does not have to be good at cracking jokes, but then, who listens :-(((
So it seems like something in my brain doesn't like storing jokes, though I do enjoy listening to them sometimes...i.e., for some time until I lose interest. And I am very bad at narrating them...I have tried a lot of times, it doesn't work out...even the Chaddi-joke, whenever I have told that to someone, he/she has given me a was-that-a-joke kind of look. Looks like I can't help myself even in this department.
Well, I am losing interest in this topic :-( Will try to concentrate for some more time...
3.Style: Big B has his charming tip-top style. His voice evokes respect and arouses curiosity in the listeners. He is like the best prof in the college...who doesn't take attendance, yet every student wants to attend his lectures coz he teaches brilliantly. His body-language is superb and his personality is exquisite. Shahrukh on the other hand has a unique haqlu style. His voice is thin and he occasionally tries to make it sound thick by speaking loud and at a high pitch. He has a nice smile; those dimples are enough to woo ladies, and he uses them efficiently. He looks more down-to-earth and friendly, possibly because of his rise from middle-class to stardom. It's my guess that it's easier to talk to Shahrukh than to Big B.
Ok, now let's see what I've got. I'm also very down-to-earth, coz I have been in the middle-class all through. I think I look good in suit. I have worn it a couple of times...on important occasions. I always forget to keep a hanky though. I walk like a robot. That's how I look, though I try my best to walk like Sanjay Dutt. I have a nice voice...more lady-killing than that of either of the gentlemen. But without being energetic, I am not sure how much of an impact I can make with that voice. My body language is very bad. I don't move a lot. And I speak without expressions. When I smile, I look sad. I struggle a lot with expressions. For example, when I have to show elation and joy when my friend comes and tells me very very happily that he has done "that" first time, the expression that really comes out is of "Saala u did it, so what? when will I do?" And God-Promise I don't mean anything like that. I don't know how to go about fixing this problem. My face has got some serious aberrations. I try to show some expression, something else shows up and I'm screwed.
4.Youthfulness: I used to think I was very youthful until a few days back when a friend of mine said I am kiddish + kidlike = kid. I guess I might feel young at old-age. I understand youth to mean jawaani, that's when all "that" happens. By Youth most people mean the post teenage adults in the twenties. But at 41 if Shahrukh Khan is representing the Youth and is bringing Youthfulness into KBC, then I guess I still have a lot of time to come out of my kiddishness and kidlikeness, i.e., kidness.
Bahut ho gaya. This topic sucks. I am not hosting KBC.
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